Romance and Similar Observations #2

 

          



         Oh romance, love, affection, mushy, gushy-ness...How you make me BARF! Lol, Just kidding! Ya'll know that if that were true I wouldn't be writing this blog. I have no interest in false emotions or virtual defense mechanisms! That stuff's for the birds. I'm just here to vent about my own personal situation. Let me start by saying, I'm not sad about being single! I would never trade in my time being single, it has been some of the most rich and fulfilling years...and years...and years of my life. Don't worry guys, I'm only 21 so the situation is only at caution level yellow. Actually...I'm almost 22, but no worries, still yellow....maybe its just because I like the color yellow.
        I've managed to almost go through my  entire college years, single. Since college is rumored to be a time for dating and relationships, I assumed that I would have a boyfriend after the 1st semester of college- Boy was I wrong!
    So, as a lonely college student with few friends and a limited social life, I did what any savvy, clueless, college student would do...I started an online dating account (you have no idea how much it shames me to admit this publicly. Shame upon me and my family). Anyways,as I read through many emails from men who had obviously not read my profile and ONLY looked at my picture, I came to two conclusions. #1. Most of the men on this site are probably psychologically unstable. (as a rule, I usually assume that everyone has at least 1 psychological disorder) and #2. Most people are shallow and they really only care about themselves. This may sound bitter, but I assure you, there is truth in that. Sure, I talked to a few guys, one stopped talking to me because I told him I made a turkey sandwich for dinner. My profile picture is of me cooking so I guess he assumed that I made gourmet dinners every night. To that I must say, "WTF?". Another guy I talked to ended up being, like, clinically depressed. He had a great personality, but crazy just can't hide itself. I'm talking to a British guy now...I'm sure it won't go anywhere. I know, "give it a chance" blah, blah, blah! There's no substitute for intuition guys. Lastly, I recently began talking to this great Christian guy who can draw, sing and dance! He's really nice, but you know what, It probably won't work out either, because good things just don't happen to me, romance-wise.  It's just what it is. I know, you're like "No Tanisha! Have hope!" To that I'd say, " Go ahead and put money on it! (No seriously, I NEED gas money!)"
      Ever since I can remember, guys have treated me like crap. Okay, maybe not like crap, but close to it. You know those girls that a guy goes out of their way to sweep off their feet? I'm not that girl. The most I can get is a half-assed (excuse the language, but there's no way to half-ass the word" half-ass")  attempt to be interested. I can be liked, appreciated, but never truly treasured. I once heard a quote that said, "To be known is to be loved and to be loved is to be known". I, want to be known. I'm talking about fully known by another person, like, past, present, future, uncensored, unashamed, fully and organically known. I want to never have to wonder if you think I'm awkward, weird, beautiful, incomparable or lovely. I don't want to even have to guess. I want my life to fall in to rhythm with your life as if we were never off beat! Lets get this straight, I don't expect any man to be perfect, flawless or even close to the infallible love that's in the Lord. I don't even want him to be! I'm so tired of hearing, " Be a better person! Be a better person and when you're good enough, love will be given to you!" Whether or not it's true, the frustration of not being able to share myself completely with another person persist.
In the meantime, I think I'll quit the online dating...maybe, and sink into the other issues I have in front of me. I will however, let you know how it goes with the British and Christian guy ;). Thanks for reading! I'll update you soon!
 For Now, Enjoy This:

Long Time No See....

Anyways, though lengthy, this is where I am at this point. I will not abandon you again my few, but dear readers! Thanks for reading!

      Alright, I'll admit it. I've abandoned my blogging for too long! It's not like I have a good excuse either, I have plenty of time! I guess you could say I've been uninspired to write lately....I'm not sure if it's a good thing or not. 
So, this blog is to catch you lovely readers up on life as of late.  Lets see...where did we leave off? Oh. I remember!
      I had just announced to you that I was leaving the gloomy doldrum that was the Georgia Southern. I couldn't have been happier! Fast forward to summer 2011. This summer can be summed up in three words:   "guy-friends", "exercise" and "Hispanics". Let me explain. I feel like I spent my entire summer with my guy-friend...lets call him...Giovanni. If you've ever had a close guy-friend, you know that it can get frustrating to spend a lot of time with them. By the end of the summer I wanted to hug him and wring his neck at the same time! Well, Giovanni is obsessed with fitness, like, so obsessed, he could probably be on the show "My weird addiction" or perhaps more appropriately, "True Life: I'm addicted to working out". Anyways, we scored some gym memberships and worked out everyday. I'm sad to say that I didn't lose a significant amount of weight because I think the universe wants me to be a chubbster forever. The bad part about being a chubbster is that everybody thinks they have a right to an opinion to your body. The "If I were skinnier..." always creeps up in your mind all the time, not because I'm self-conscious, but because its true. Its gets to be so frustrating that I'm like, "If one more person pokes my effing pooch, I'm gonna go ham on their face!" I'm not the freakin' Pilsbury dough girl! ...(woo-sah). Anyways, after exercizing for a month and losing only 5 lbs, our limited gym membership expired. While Giovanni and the Gym (which, by the way, is a good title for a documentary  that tracks his addiction) were happening, I found myself spending a lot of time with Giovanni's family, otherwise known as "My hispanic family". I've known them since I was in 9th grade! Every Tuesday we would go to the Latin American Association to practice Spanish and help those who were learning English. That was pretty fun actually, we met a lot of great people that we got to see week after week! 

This is the building most of my classes are in!

By the end of the summer my sister had moved back to Atlanta and I was signing a lease to live in an apartment with 3 other strangers! 
      UGA is a wonderful school! My classes are the most challenging that I've ever taken and guess what...I'm only failing one! :D.  Starting at this school was difficult, of course. I had to learn an entire bus system to find my classes. Did I mention my classes were hard? I didn't know anyone and...Did I mention my classes were hard? I came home every night to an empty room and a seemingly inactive online social life (thanks for nothing facebook!). So, I know what you're thinking, "Just get a boyfriend you dummy!". Nope. Because of course, UGA girls got it goin' on! I bet when the guys get on this campus, they don't even know what to do! I've always prided myself on my simple, relaxed, Martha Stewarty look, but that doesn't cut it here! So no boyfriend! So what was the next option? A PUPPY! Yes, I got a puppy 2 months after I got here! Her name is Missy. She is expensive, messy, hyper active and the sweetest thing you ever did see! I'm up to my elbows in puppy pee almost every day and her poop makes me want to vomit. However, the best part of my day is when she snuggles next to me at night! 
      Slowly but surely, I've gained friends and found things to get involved with! It turns out my roommate situation turned out marvelously. They are the best I could have gotten under the situation! I can't even believe that the semester is finally over. Sometimes I forget that this is my first semester here actually! At times I miss PBA. Life was easier, the experiences were priceless and the memories I made there were unforgettable, but I don't regret leaving. Being back in Atlanta has taught me to appreciate family and cherish friends that have been there no matter where I am! 

The Wisdom from My Wisdoms

"A woman of true beauty offers others the grace to be and the room to become" 

    


          It has been a long time since I last updated my blog. To tell the truth, I just haven't had much inspiration. My thoughts have been filled with my most recent endeavours: Exercising/losing weight, cleaning and of course, getting my wisdom teeth removed!
    I wasn't expecting the removal of my wisdom teeth (from now on they will be referred to as "My Wisdoms") to be a remarkable occasion. If anything, it would be full of pain and lament for the loss of my sweet, precious, Wisdoms.  However,  it ended up being just the occasion that I needed. 
     I was all flutters and jitters as I walked through the door of the dentist office. I mean, what did they expect, really? They just gave me a 1 inch thick packet describing all of the horrifying things that could happen to me as a result of the surgery! Excuse me, but,  the possibility of accidental death or permanent nerve damage was on the table here! 
    But, as I was escorted to the operation chair, a small light at the end of the tunnel appeared in the form of a sweet, sweet, Latina lady named Rosaria. Now, when I say this lady was SWEET, I mean she was sweeter than caramel apple pie with ice cream...and whipped cream...and a sugar coated crust! From the moment she walked in the room, she was reassuring, comforting and caring! She even pet my nappy hair, which was a feat that I wasn't even willing to do that morning (seriously, I woke up and stuck 2 bobby pins in it...no...I didn't care)! She even spoke to me in Spanish once she found out what my major was! I learned the word "jugoza" which means juicy....she thought my veins were juicy =D. She was just an all around, kind, inviting spirit! I was instantly reassured and utterly impressed!
    I read a quote recently that said, 
"A woman of true beauty offers others the grace to be and the room to become" 
    Rosaria reminded of this quote and how much going out of your way to love those around you really means! 
     Recently I've found myself distanced from those around me. Whether it be in the form of not making as much effort to spend quality time, not using kind words, being impatient or  extremely passive aggressive.  Somewhere, I forgot how hard life can be and how important it is to let my life be a place where people can feel free to grow and be themselves. The world is tough enough, it shouldn't be reflected in me as well. I'm so thankful to the people like Rosaria, who stand as an example and remind me of what's important in life. Sometimes a little refocusing is all you really need! And that, ladies and gentlemen, is "The Wisdom from My Wisdoms"

"I Can't Believe in a God Who..."

                            

     

     

    I'm sure you've heard the sentence," I can't believe in a God who would send people to Hell who haven't ever heard of Him". I've thought about that sentence long and hard, plenty of times. In fact, I made my roommate ask me this question while I was getting my tattoo ( philosophical questions distract me from pain ). 

   I was at church Wednesday night sitting with my friends. I had thought the message    was going to be about prayer, but, by the time I realized it was about evangelism it was too late to run out! 

Prayer- O.K
Reading the Bible- O.K
Spreading the "Good News"- Uhhh...I'll just slip out the back...
      When It comes down to it, I just suck at evangelism! It's not really that I suck, I just care too much about what people think (Hey, I said this was honesty year). Fear literally overwhelms me. Instead of the powerful news of the Gospel coming out, a weak, apologetic, ho-hum, mumble of a suggestion seeps through.
 Sad. I know. 
Back to the story.
     So, while I'm sitting in church service the pastor addresses the lingering question " How can we believe in a God that sends people to Hell who have never heard His name?" 
Well, let me rephrase it to give you a clearer perspective on this question. It should sound like this :
 "I can't believe that the church would let people who have never heard Jesus' name, go to Hell without ever hearing the Gospel."
      That should punch you right in the guts. I know it punches me in the guts! Why don't we let it for a second if that's what we need.  Wow. 
    No one likes to talk about Hell. No one wants to believe that people will actually go there one day. But, the fact is that no one is blameless. Even the nicest of people have hurt others and themselves. Its our nature. 
If I am to call myself a Christian, then I cannot ignore that there is a real Heaven and a real Hell. Therefore, I don't get off on shrugging off the Gospel. I don't get to say "that's not my job"...because it is.
     As you can imagine, I needed a confidence booster after that service. So I dusted off my Bible  (it didn't have dust, but lets just say I haven't opened it enough lately) and turned to Ezekiel 33. I turned there because there is a story that relates directly to the message.Most of the chapter can be boiled down to this verse:

"If the watchman sees the sword coming and does not blow the trumpet to warn the people and the sword comes and takes someone’s life, that person’s life will be taken because of their sin, but I will hold the watchman accountable for their blood."

      What a sad day it will be when we see people that we know going to Hell and we could have saved them by just opening our mouths?  The Gospel requires word and deed. Our words are what separate humanitarians and Christians. I do not want to be accountable for not sounding the trumpet just because I cared too much about what people thought. 
Ezekiel 34 even goes further in saying,
" My sheep were scattered over the whole earth and no one searched or looked for them.... because my shepherds cared for themselves rather than my flock" 
OUCH! That was a pimp slap in the face! 
If God is serious about the lost, then so should I be. The urgency is greater now than ever. I need to get a fire under my tail like, 5 minutes ago! I hope this post ,if anything, is sobering. Pray for courage. I guess I can't chicken out now that I posted this blog! 
(sorry for the rough ending...)

The Best Whoopin' Story Never Told Part II: The Whoopin'

            

       It was a typical evening in the Hollis household. My mom and dad were watching TV in the living room, and my brother and I were playing games. If you have a brother or sister around your age, you probably know that playing and fighting are kind of mixed in to the same activity. That night, my brother and I were fighting more than usual. We were 8 and 9 years old, so you can imagine how annoying it must have been for my parents. 
Unbeknown to us, while all of our fighting and tattling was going on, my father had had enough! He issued the ultimatum.  He said " If I hear you guys yelling again, I'm whoopin' you both!". 


          My brother and I took this warning to heart. In fact, we let it settle there and make a nice home. Daddy's whoopin's were borderline child abuse. My dad is a short stocky man with arms the size of Popeye's (No, it's not because he likes spinach). Once that belt got to swingin', it wasn't stoppin'. Needless to say, an encounter with the belt was undesirable. 
     We continued playing quietly, until brother had to go and do something (I can't even remember what) that made me mad! I let out a drawn out "Mooooooooommy!" and It was too late to put the words back in my mouth. The words were spilled out on the floor like a glass of water running too fast to sop back up. My daddy got up and asked " Alright, who's first?". Now you already know, it WASN'T me. What do I look like volunteering myself to get the first whoopin'? I wasn't going down like that! I was waaaaay too clever. So I sent my brother to the slaughter. It was wrong, I know, but up until that point I had never been whooped by my dad. 
I listened to my brother through the door. For some reason it used to be HILARIOUS to hear my brother get a whoopin'! I never knew what went on in there, but it sounded like my dad was whoopin' Spider Man or somethin'! I'm even laughing now. 
      
          Anyways, after he was finished with my brother, my number was up. My heart sank. I was crying before the belt even touched me! I was a softy. The door closed behind me. I was so scared! I begged him not to whoop me! He showed no mercy. He raised up the belt strap to swing and as it came down,something magical happened! I caught the belt strap with my very hands! Yes, with my hands. This was my last hope. There was no going back. 
     My dad yanked the belt from me. I kept holding on. He yanked again, harder this time. I did not surrender that belt. By then he had enough. He pulled the belt strap so hard that I thought I would release it, but I did not. He was obviously stronger than me, so as he was pulling the belt, he was pulling me along with it. All of a sudden, he began pulling up! I found myself lifted off the floor while still clinging on to the belt strap. Yes, I was hanging in the air, holding to my father's belt strap, which was being held by my father....with one hand.... 
       
        Then, to my surprise, he chuckled. It was the miracle I had been waiting for. He put me back on the ground and struck a bargain with me. He said "If you walk out of here, get in the tub and go straight to bed, then I won't whoop you.".....And that's exactly what I did. Even as a young sprout I could recognize a deal too great to walk away from. 
To this day, I pride myself on the fact that I never got whooped with that belt strap. Not once. And for that reason, this is the greatest whoopin' story never told. 

The Best Whoopin' Story Never Told: Part I (Whoopins 101)

                       

          The other day I was having a conversation with my older brother about a time when we both got whoopins. Now, I believe that everyone should have a good whoopin' story, especially if you're black! Call it child abuse if you want to, but a parent should never hesitate to "spare the rod". I'll start this one off with some foundations in whoopin' etiquette. Let's call it "Whoopins 101".

1. There are a few differences between a "spanking" and a "whoopin'". A whoopin' evokes large rain drop sized tears along with deep feelings of guilt and physical pain. A spanking may produce some crocodile tears with thoughts like, "That was it?" or "Whew! Glad that's over...Quick! Remember to look sad...." A spanking is what most clever kids aim for.


2. You know you're getting a whoopin' when the parent is yelling with you. It may sound sort of like a, "Didn't. I. Tell. You. Not. To. Do (insert punishable action here) "


3. A Spanking is done with a small to average sized leather/pleather belt or a hand. A whoopin' is conducted with either a LARGE mens leather belt strap, a switch or anything within arms length of your parent. 


As a child I got plenty of spankings, but I was so terrified of that belt strap that I made sure we would never encounter each other! I am sad to say that we did encounter each other, two times actually. This brings me to the start of:
The Best Whoopin' Story Never Told.....

...So the World Didn't End.

                                           

      As I slipped on my jeans and shoes last Saturday morning, I realized that for many people, today was the end of the world. I'm sure you know by now that an 89 year-old man by the name of Herbert Camping predicted that the world would end on May 21, 2011. First of all.... He couldn't have given everyone an earlier notice? I mean, a one month notice isn't much time at all. In fact, it's just rude. I feel a little bad for the man though. As an (almost) ninety year-old man, all his dignity was lost because of a wrong prediction. He was wrong, yes, but it makes it a little sadder because he seemed sincere. Granted, he did make Christians look even crazier than everyone already thinks we are. Though the media does a darn good job too (our last chance was with Touched by an Angel, but then it got cancelled... After that there was no hope.).  Personally, I am convinced that we are indeed living in the  End Times; however, I was pretty sure it wouldn't be last Saturday. 

          Although I was mostly sure that the world wouldn't end last Saturday, It got me thinking: At some point it will. We all have to face what is on the other side of life, whether it be by the world ending or by death. Every one of us will have to account for our lives. 

      Honestly, if the world ended on last Saturday, I would have regretted not doing more with my life. There aren't any excuses I can use, though I am sure I could give you 20 right off the top of my head. The fact is that there is so much more that I aspire to spiritually and personally. Mr. Camping's "Dooms Day Prediction" (I refuse to call it a prophecy) at best, served as a reminder that everyone will have to account for their lives one day. What will we do to change the things that we fear judgement of ? 

                                                                              

                                                                                 Let's start now.

Artists of the Week

This week's Recording Artist of the week is Jeremy Messersmith
Genre: Folk/Acoustic
Why I like him: His sound is soft and sweet. His music is both refreshing and relaxing! His voice is beautiful!

Dorothea Lange

Image of a migrant Mother by Dorothea Lange

     Visual Artist of the week is photographer Dorothea Lange. Lange was a photojournalist who documented the reality of poverty during the Great Depression. I like her work because there is strong emotion attached to it as well as a story to be told. If you like her work I encourage you to look for more!

The Haircut

      I can't keep it a secret any longer! This week, I had to go through one of the most depressing and heartbreaking experiences that ,hopefully, I'll ever have to go through. I...had to get my hair cut off. This may be an exaggeration, but it's exactly how I felt. 
    Now usually, people get their hair cut because they want a fresh new style or because they're donating it. They get their hair cut for probably any other reason other than my own . However,  I had to get my hair cut because it died....yes....it died. Cause of death: The Perm (curse you!).  I spent so many months trying to revive it only to surrender it to the hands of my ghetto hair stylist.
      It was a cold, dark day. I felt  that the weather was also mourning the loss of my hair.
 As I was sitting in the chair, the ghetto hair stylist took the clippers to the back of my head and shaved it all off.  There was a sinking feeling in the bottom of my stomach....it was gone, yes, all of it (well at least the back). 
      I keep getting reassuring comments from my family and friends, but they don't understand...It's not the hair that was lost- it was the battle. The battle for new growth.     
Anyways, I'm still trying to cope. Here's what it looks like.

....At least I can put all the headbands I make to good use.

Did Somebody Say Horchata???

 Let me just say this,


"I LOVE Mexican food!"


 It's all my mother's fault! She exposed me to it at a very young age. As a result, I convulsively search for great Mexican recipes that need to be shared! Today's special recipe is Horchata!  Horchata is a rice-based beverage. There are actually many different ways to make it, from Rum to Hibiscus  flavored! Today, I'm going to keep it simple! 

Ingredients

• 1 cup long grain white rice
• 2 cups skinless almonds
• 1-inch piece cinnamon bark
• 1 cup milk
• 8 cups water
• 1/2 cup sugar
• 1/4 teaspoon vanilla extract
• Ice cubes

Directions

     Wash and drain the rice. Using a spice grinder (an electric coffee grinder works well too), grind the rice until fine. Add almonds and cinnamon bark. Grind. Pour into a bowl, then  add 3 1/2 cups of hot water and let sit overnight, covered. Add milk, then blend rice mixture until smooth using a blender. Add 2 1/2 cups of water and continue blending. Add sugar and vanilla extract. Strain Horchata into a bowl first using a very fine metal strainer (or a cheese cloth if you have one). Finish with up to an additional 2 cups of water until it achieves a milky consistency. Enjoy over ice! 

New Feature: Artist of the Week

  After much consideration, I have decided to make a blog series devoted to two of my favorite things: Music and Art! So each week I will feature a new recording artist that I've fallen in love with and a visual artist who inspires me! 
      This week's recording artist may not be well known in some areas, but when I found him, he was automatically a winner. I know what I like as soon as I hear it. So without further ado, I introduce the first featured "Artist of the Week": 
                          Jesse Ruben


Genre: Acoustic/Pop/Rock
Why I like him: He has natural talent, a raw sound and his music is filled with personality and honesty. 

Self Portrait by Alfons Mucha

The second artist I would like to feature in Alfons Mucha. He is definitely one of my favorite artists! He is a Czech artist who lived between 1860-1938. He is considered the father of  the style  Arte Nouveau! Arte Nouveau is my favorite style of art because it depicts the beauty of nature with lots of flowing lines and complex, detailed designs. 
Here are a few of his paintings that I love! However, don't hesitate to do a little more research on him because there are SO much more of his artwork!

Summer by Alfons Mucha

Moet et Chandon

           

Coping Mechanisms: An End of Semester Reflection

      The past few years have been filled with numerous changes and adjustments for me. This year in particular has brought the most change I've had in awhile. Looking back on it, I am surprised with my ability to cope with such changes! When I left PBA for GSU I was terrified to go to a large, secular/public university. There would be "wild, libidinous college boys walking around like rabid animals", boisterous, animalistic parties and worst of all......co-ed dorms! 
Not surprisingly, GSU is the home to all of the aforementioned things....... perhaps that's an understatement. Although those things are pretty normal to like, 90% of all college students, I had not yet been exposed to such...behaviors. I didn't think I could cope with leaving my friends who had been so dear to me or the sunsets that I loved watching so much. 
I don't know why I thought the entire transition would be so traumatizing, but I did. Not that it has been a picnic. I said I was coping...not adjusting, remember? This has definitely been one of my hardest semesters ever. As the semester closes, I am forced to look back over the last few months. I had a lot of alone time. Too much probably. I have succeeded in some areas, failed in others, met new people, and learned new things. All in all,  this 3 month stint at GSU was sucked up, and finished with victory. I think it's time I go home now....

I Don't Think I Was Prepared for This: Part II

     Last week was a hard week for reasons I will not explain in this post. Needless to say, because of last week's...issues...this week was looking pretty dim. 
   All of last week I had been checking the status on an application I sent in (see "I don't think I was ready for this"). I've been checking everyday since I applied. But somehow I knew this was the week.
    I woke up Monday morning feeling like a bag of rocks! I didn't even get out of the bed for my class. I slept in for awhile, eventually getting out of bed like some pathetic, helpless rag doll. The first thing I did was check my email. 
Nothing. 
I went about my day, riding my bike and going to the rest of my classes. When I got home I checked my email again. There was a message waiting for me that said,
 "Welcome Future Bulldog!"
 I was in!!! 
      Part of me couldn't believe it! I mean, I had been praying about it for weeks! Don't get me wrong, I believed that God would come through, but there was a part of me that felt that it was still too good to be true. See, I have this  idea that the universe automatically works against me. Sad. True. It's probably because I play these twisted games in my head that basically gamble on whether or not the universe will work against me. For example, if I'm riding my bike, I gamble on whether or not a car will drive by as as soon as I decide to cross the street. It gets worse. I gamble on whether or not I'll miss a quiz, lose a game or if my plans fall will through. Most bad things that happen I blame on the universe- not myself. So imagine my surprise when I actually got in! 
The whole time I was was so scared that the universe would intervene once again, leaving me on the losing end! (Yes, I understand that that is NOT a good mentality to have). Granted, I'm still on egg shells about whether or not something will fall through and I won't be able to go to school at all....but that's another story.
      All in all, God came through! There are so many reasons why I needed to be closer to home and He knows every one (even though my prayers were a full list of reasons why He should let me go to UGA) <----Not Smart. I'm so excited about next year and SUPER thankful that I serve a God that makes things happen!

I Don't Know Why I'm Still Laughing About This!

Scene takes place in the corridors of the art building. Discussion about arachnophobia suddenly emerges. Enter characters.....

Classmate 1: If you think about it, arachnophobia is pretty irrational.

Me: No its not!

Classmate 2: Well,  they're bigger than you.

Teacher: Yeah, but some spiders can kill you.

Classmate 2: Yeah, that's true

Me: I once heard of this spider in Iraq that if it bites you... you're dead!

Teacher: There's no antidote?

Me: Nope

Classmate 1: I once heard about these ants in the jungle that carried off an entire baby...

Me: *pauses*...what?

                                                  (cue eruption of laughter)

                                                           Scene Close

And The Best Proposal EVER Award Goes to.......

                                                  Edward Rochester to Jane Eyre!!!!! 

Maybe I'm a little too sentimental, but wow, when I heard this proposal I 'bout jumped out of my seat! I won't lie...a few girly squeals did escape.And perhaps an "Awww!" or a "You get yo man girl!". It was Precious! TOO precious!

       The proposal takes place in the garden at night ( did someone say perfect scene? ) Jane thinks Mr. Rochester is about to marry someone else when he finally reveals his love for her! Which is as follows (more or less): 


       Edward Rochester:  I offer you my heart, my hand and a share of all my possessions.
I ask you to pass through life at my side, to be my second self and best earthly companion.
 My bride is here, because my equal is here and my likeness. Jane, will you marry me? 


       I love you as my own flesh!  I beg of you to marry me!  Say, "Edward, give me my name." Say,"Edward, I will marry you." 
 Jane, I must have you as my own, entirely as my own. Will you be mine? Accept me. Marry me....Make my happiness, I will make yours. 


If I get proposed to, someone's gotta step up their game. 






                                                    The standard has been set.....

Just The Way You Are

      Have you ever met those people who are completely beautiful? Not just outwardly beautiful, but most importantly, inwardly beautiful! I know this girl who is just beautiful! She has a great personality, radiates joy to those around her, is super talented and when she talks- people listen. Yet she is always complaining about how beautiful she isn't . I'm probably such a hypocrite for writing this blog, but hey, who said I was perfect?  
     I used to think that shallowness was just an American issue. But it's not. It's an everywhere issue. It's a human issue. I could probably enlighten the world about how we should value ourselves because we are made in the image of God. And that might make you feel good for a second. But I'm wasting my time unless you really believe it's true. I won't pretend like it is not hard. I know it is. People are always trying to figure out ways to create standards that no one can actually reach. What gets upsets me the most is how everyone says beauty is on the inside, yet they seem to contradict themselves at EVERY SINGLE TIME! Its like people all of a sudden become a better people once they look attractive or something. The sad part is that people buy in to it and wouldn't depart from the lie even if you revealed the truth.
     Any who, I wish people could see how beautiful and precious they truly are. And stop waiting for others to validate their beauty. Because honestly, people LOVE to validate others appearance. To rank people in order from "best created" to "worst created"- how sick is that? And when you walk around like you don't have value, people will take advantage of that. Even sicker. 
    Basically what I'm trying to say is stop waiting for people's approval and be brave enough to love you. Not in a cliche Mary J. Blige way (although Mary is on point sometimes). Simply be okay with you. Stop striving to be what you already are. The world is always going to be the way it is; to smile in the face of it all not only makes you victorious- it makes you even more beautiful! 

Red Bull Smoothie- Just What the Doctor Ordered

Okay, so I just found a new recipe that could be just what the doctor ordered (if doctors actually recommended that you drink Red Bull )! It is healthy, full of fruits, full of energy and 100% delicious! 



Red Bull Smoothie:


1/2 can (8.3 fl oz) Sugar Free Red Bull energy drink
4 fresh strawberries (sliced)
1 banana (sliced into smaller pieces and frozen)
1 mango (sliced into smaller pieces)
1 cup orange juice or fruit juice of your choice (a little lemon juice might be nice)
 *Add ice cubes if needed
Put all the ingredients in your blender and blend until smooth, serve immediately for best taste!

Fashion Advice for the Broke College Student

     Let me start by saying that I am NOT the most fashionable person in the world. When writing on subjects such as this one, it is important to show oneself humble because, really, you can't just give fashion advice and be prideful about it. That's not cool. 
    While I am not the most fashionable of young women, I'd like to think my style is somewhat unique and very cute. I'll be honest, In my formative years, I experimented with certain fashions that are not to be experimented with, i.e. the excessive layering of prints that don't match, flare jeans as leggings or even an occasional ripped under shirt here and there. I also went through a stage where I wanted to dress like a gangster boo. Shameful, I know. That was until I discovered the dress, a perfect solution for the thick, petite figure. 
I am often asked about my outfits.  Many of you would be surprised to know that a majority of my clothes come from Goodwill. Yes, Goodwill. I am not the one to spend excessive amounts of money on clothing (though I do get a little out of control at times).
Here's the breakdown:


75%  of my clothes come from Goodwill
15%  are from Forever 21
5%    are hand-me-downs
2%    are free
3% from random stores like Target and Ross




Most of my clothing items cost less than $10 each. Usually less than that even. Here's the secret.

Cardigans are a staple item

•  They are easy to find in thrift stores because lots of old people give them away (creepy, I know). I always buy a bright colored one. Yellow ones are my favorite. Next to that is red, then grey. 

Vintage Tee's are also great if you find a good one

• Don't waste your money at Forever 21 looking for a vintage tee that isn't really vintage. Thrift stores have real vintage tee's for a lot less! 

        

• Dresses are a thrift store's best kept secret. Most of my dresses come from the thrift store in fact! Why, because NOBODY looks in the dress section of the thrift store. So all the vintage, boho, classy dresses are left alone for me to find. I have actually found really nice dresses from stores like Anne Taylor Loft (what I usually find), Express and American eagle. 

    

• Skirts are easily found and easy to fit in to your wardrobe. All it takes is a nice shirt and a cute belt! There are TONS and TONS of interesting skirts to look through!

If you're a broke college student like me, then perhaps Goodwill is the place to start looking. I understand that Goodwill is a little weird to some people, but for me it does just fine. Don't abandon regular stores though! You definitely need to keep your style fresh and interesting with some new items! But if you're pinchin' nickels together like me, don't hesitate to stop by your local thrift store and take a look around.

* I will not neglect to mention that after saying all of this, my favorite store in the whole world  is Anthropologie :)